Today is the 1 year remembrance of Mom's death. I've shared many photos and thoughts on my personal Instagram and Facebook, but the Blog was so important to Mom. It needed to be updated, especially today. I promised myself that I would not stop and eventually turn it into how we all cope and "Kerry On."
Last night I was in Mom's email account cleaning out the junk mail and came across a few special gems in her banking folder that had been misfiled. These emails were between her and Kylie from April 2015. Mom was helping assist with a psychology project to interview someone who had to adjust to an illness or chronic condition. Kylie asked several wonderful but difficult questions; which allowed Mom to really think and express her situation in her own written words. I love reading things from Mom and I hope you enjoy this also. It's obviously very special because you can see where she was mentally and emotionally just 5 months before her death. She shall never cease to amaze me! I've complied several of my favorite parts below. I would also love to see Kylie's actual paper one day because I'm sure it's very beautifully done!
During these seven years my rewards as a mother have been more than one could ever imagine. My children have been "the wind beneath my wings" to put it lightly. The most supportive loving family any mother could ever ask for. From graduations, to marriage, to grandchildren, to new careers, new homes, I have seen them grow into wonderful caring adults. And my granddaughter grow from just a child to a beautiful young lady.
Reaction from others is always very encouraging and heartwarming. I have had such a wonderful group of friends and of course my loving family supporting me through all these years of fighting. Cancer has changed my life and the way I view the world...
I think maybe the biggest thing I see is how much people take for granted their life, many don't see how each day is so precious. It's through situations like mine that you really appreciate what you have and not want for the materialistic or self centered desires. Cancer in a way has been a gift to me and my family, to open our eyes to the importance of love and friendship. It's brought us closer to God and prayer for support. Most of all to appreciate how greatly we've been blessed and to just breathe that in and embrace it every day!
It's been a hard thing to think about goals and future when you've been giving a diagnosis like mine. However I have found that you have to live each day to the fullest, enjoy every moment and live as though you are going to live forever, cause if you think you have no future you would go crazy!
We always try to have a goal of some activity or fun thing to do. Whether it be a family vacation, a weekend get away, planning a party or wedding, something to focus on and look forward to.
I pray a lot and I try to stay as positive as possible, keep a smile on my face, because if today does happens to be my last day I would want to be happy one!